Thoughts in red convey my seeking response to a private e-mail.
I was awake last night talking on the computer and then the telephone to a most intriguing new friend. I haven't met her yet but I think it was about 4 a.m. when we finally said good night.
Y'all don't know me too well, but those who do may be flabbergasted to learn I was on the phone for such a long time. And I was comfortable at it.
Of course, I cannot see the future, but I suspect I have an interesting time coming. For how long, I don't know.
She told me that she wants a committed relationship in which the two parties do not live together. That may be a good idea, considering my house-keeping.... I do not mean to infer that it will happen for her with me. No committment is stated nor should it be inferred. For God's sake, I haven't even met her yet! That's just what she told me she wants. My friend says I have a pattern in my relationships and I am hoping to learn what it is. Having hope, being kind, starting out with some enthusiasm, not repressing my heart?
Be cool. What does that mean? Pretend I do not care? You might as well ask a turtle to live without it's shell. Seeking answers from anyone with a clue.
That is something I was willing to do before now... but you know what? I'm not going there. Zay gezunt. (Goodbye.) My broken-hearted sob story is closed.
Ikh bin a bisl antoysht vos mir kenen nisht a bisl lenger eyner mitn andern redn.
Nu, ikh vel vartn af dir, libhaber.
And at last, I have someone to speak Yiddish with, learn more Yiddish from. I'm not Jewish but I love Yiddish. So many words we use originate there. (Sorry, I was up all night; no examples are coming to me at the moment. This entry is about her, anyway.)
I didn't recognize the hook in her bait, but last night she reeled me in. (To definitely wanting to meet sometime.) It's just a matter of finding out when we can get together now. She lives two counties away and has kids, and is taking classes for a teaching degree.
Sound impossible? Gib mir nisht keyn eyn hore! Khas visholem! Ob got vil, schist a bezem!!!
Baleboste -- baal-A-bahst--n.--Landlady, hostess,owner, boss, housewife.
2 comments:
where in the world did you learn yiddish!!! i want to learn some!
It might be presumptuous of me to pitch in my two pennies on your patterns in relationships, but I see reflections of myself in the things you've been saying. If you're open to them, I'll share them with you or you can just tell me it's nunnamine, no harm, no foul.
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