a useful thing to know

 

So this morning, I’m out in the backyard with the dogs.

The doctor had left me a note saying that she would give me a dollar a minute for poop-scooping the backyard.

I won’t ask that.  I AM a PROFESSIONAL, after all.

I will scoop her yard for free.  I know that she will help my pets when I need her.

 

Anyway…

I’m out in the backyard and my nose is feeling snotty.  No tissue in my pocket.  I use, instead, the gift of one of my few boyfriends ever.  Alan was the better one.

He taught me “the country blow.”

That might sound dirty, but the truth is "the country blow" is useful is odd outdoor situations.

 

Anyway, Alan taught me how to evacuate my nasal passages without soiling my hands or needing a receptacle.  

 

You just grab the tip of your nose and turn it away from the nostril you wish to clear, then push all your wind into that nostril.  “Woosh!”  Done.  A clean getaway.

 

What did I teach Alan?  Hehehehe….   That’s private.