I have a longing to see Vicki one last time so that I can get the image of her long, depressed face out of my head. I want to see a slimmer, happy Vicki... with that beautiful laughter. And honestly, I would love to see her with some she adores and is happy with. Someone who is whatever I wasn't. (The farther away it gets, the clearer it becomes and the answers or speculations on the answers come into focus.)
Sherbet/sorbet for the mind. That's all. I don't want to do anything or say anything. I wish I could be invisible and just catch a glimpse. The last time I saw her is burnt into my brain. I just want to know she is happy.
She's been on my mind so much now because it's the fourth of July and the park where they celebrate in her city is just across the street from her house.
Other people won't know how lucky they are to see a tall, beautiful woman watching the fireworks with her friends and her kids.
Yeah, I know this makes me pathetic. The haunting diminishes every day, but the fact of love remains... as empty as it can be, but present nonetheless.
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