Noodles, poodles and clean hands

My new boss is a cheerful woman.  Even when she is upset.  When something goes wrong, she exclaims "Poodles!"

She'll say, "While your noodling around maybe you can figure out how to assemble this."

I'm the one who takes care of things like removing lizards and snakes that get in the building, replacing the flag when it gets warn out, lubricating the bookdrop lock system, spraying the black widow spiders that like to live in the bookdrop. 

I get carried away sometimes. The other day when the power went out I ran home to get flashlights.  I have at least six flashlights.  I am only one person but I guess I don't like wandering in the pitch dark.

 

In other news, I see there's a study out about women having cleaner hands than men. (That is, that we are a little more likely than men to wash our hands.)  File that under DUH!

How many millions were spent on that?  Who are the crafty thieves who do studies like that?  Don't they know they are unnecessary?  Is this a big revelation to somebody?  Does it change the way we live?

<<shakes head>>

<<rolls eyes>>

<<sighs>>

Do you ever get tired of absurd stuff like this?  I sure do.

Hand me the money, people, and I will remind you that we already knew this.

My question: Does the kingpin who gets these studies going wash his money before he rolls in it?

Geez.