Wednesday a.m.

I mowed the lawn yesterday, and took down old branches that have been hanging since the hurricanes.  I did mow around perrywinkles and a bright yellow flower, the name of which I do not yet know.  I was feeling girly and sensitive.

I like mowing for the instant gratification. Get 'er done!

I also like the things that come to mind when I mow.  I thought about things that seemed like good journal topics but unfortunately I had to keep my hand on the mower.  It would have been silly to keep having to restart the mower every time I thought of something because I wanted to take notes.  I figure if the ideas were any good they'll show back up when the time is right.

I didn't need to take notes to remember what I was thinking about while I mowed the semi-circle in front of my house.  The topic was boobage.  Aren't boobs the greatest?  I remember the first time a large-breasted woman pulled me to her bosom.  I was just a kid and I was never the same after.  Though they may cause back pain to their sporters I aesthetically appreciate them very much.  Sometimes I find myself looking at people and just dying to cuddle....  And then you get me in a room of big girls... damn.  (I should have some shame here... but I don't.)

I also think great things when I'm washing my hair, but I don't spend much time washing my hair anymore because the water here is bad and I hate bathing in it.  I changed over to Lexan tableware because all of my stainless steel was getting pitted.

I bought a webcam/mic yesterday and installed it last night, but I uninstalled it this morning out of frustration.  I was too tired last night to do anything remotely logical so I'm going to do it all again some other time.  You might get me to chat live with you, but only the unfortunate few will get to see my face.

I bear some resemblance to Frankenstein's monster.  I hasn't hurt me though.  People like and even love me, regardless.

The truth is that I broke my jaw as a kid (when I went through the car windshield) but nobody knew it until a few years ago when a dentist pointed out where the bones had fused.  I always wondered why my face is crooked like William "Billy the Kid" Bonney.  Now I know.

So there's a load of stuff in my car to bring in.  Water, kitty litter, softener salt... wanna come over and lend a hand?  I'll give you breakfast.

Yeah, I spent a weeks pay yesterday. (I do not make much money.)  I tried to rationalize it.  "Well...  I am due a tax return equal to this amount."   That's why poor people stay poor, you know.  I should eat the money I spent and use the tax return to make some kind of investment.  But what?

I was also wondering if I really saved money by buying bulk loads of garbage bags and stuff.  I do save $3 on bags of water softener salt.  You gotta like that.  You save more than it took in gas to get to the savings warehouse you are doing good.  And kitty litter. I save on that, too. Yeah, yeah.

There are many wondrous things for sale but I try very hard to not buy things I won't actually use.  I stop to lust over the kitchen-aid utensils but I always move on without one in my cart.  Everyone deserves a bitchin' can opener and silicone spatulas but, geez, I don't really cook!  Most of my food is prepared for me.  I'll get by, somehow.

I do own baking stones.  Oh! Some of the best things in life!  I made sure to bring them with me when I fled during the hurricanes.  They are great and somebody will wet their britches with glee when they get them after I die.  Crispy pizza, perfect tater tots, cookies done evenly... oohhhh!

PS:  Remember to "spring forward" one hour this weekend.