I'd rather be sleeping.

The thought of wrinkled clothes and angst has had me awake for a while now.  I slipped downstairs to move clothes from washer to dryer about an hour ago.  I have an interview Monday.  I don't expect to get the job.  I'm not on the "A" List of library folk.  It sure takes the pressure off.  It makes it easier to look in other places for work, but the truth is that I love the library. I love finding things out and I love helping people get information and entertainment.

I guess that makes me sort of a reporter/concierge by avocation.  The difference between working in a library and reporting is that I don't have to write about what I find out.

As for the angst, my buddy Cristy is coming over to my place on Sunday and she's going to help me rid myself of the weighty collection of ridiculous things I am burdened with.

I already feel the pain of tossing away memories and yet...  I'm ready.  I have so much stuff that there's no room for people.

You know what?  I want people.  I don't need boxes of stuff that I can't see and don't use.

I go into other people's homes and see how simply they live without a great burden of things.  They have places to sit.  What a concept!

I hope that Cristy will be gentle with me.  I am anxious to be freer.  If I could pack my life into my car...  WOW.  But let's be serious.  My clothes, kitchen and cat would be crammed into my little Saturn.  Toolbox.  Bicycle.  Camping gear.

I am visualizing turning my head, nodding consent to throwing things out, waving them away, even bagging them myself.

I bought masking tape so that the bags can be labelled for the trashpickers.  I don't want to have to clean up bags that have been torn into before the garbage truck comes.  I don't wanna see that stuff.  I'm hoping the label "sheets" will inspire "recyclers" to just take the whole bag rather than make ne clean it up.

They really grabbed every bit of the immense staghorn fern that my landlord pushed to the street.  I was going to cut a few pieces the next day after mentioning it to friends, but when I went to the house the next day to harvest some "puppies" (as my neighbor calls them) the entire plant was gone. 

How can I tell you how big the plant was?  I think it would have barely fit inside my little car if the seats were removed and would have weighed about as much as two grown men.  That sucker was BIG.

The poor thing was not unlike a piece of bread tossed to fish, with people tugging at it until it finally disappeared.

My neighbor hacked three "puppies" off with his machete for me.  One for my step-mom, one for my sister and one for old times sake that I put back up in the tree.

I wish I'd taken two more for my friends, but I suppose they'll live.

I have so many people on my mind.  I hung up on Mo last night because Em FINALLY picked up her phone.  I just said "Call me back!" only moments after she identified herself and hung up on her.  Mo, I'm so sorry!!!

I should have let my house phone ring but I was calling Em on a cell phone and was expecting a message instead of a voice.  I was sooo raised by wolves.  Wolves?  Heck... monkeys.

I need to not be worn out on Monday.  That's why I washed clothes at 4 a.m.  I need to make good use of time.  I need to be rested, crisp, nicely dressed, shiny.

They probably already know who they want for the job of rectifying library card accounts and retrieving inter-library loans.  But at least this time, I'm actually getting an interview.  None of this denial of an interview (for a full-time position doing actually LESS than what I have been doing for four years) due to "lack of training." (What a crock!) 

I'm over trying to find justice on that.

Here's over two hours flown by.  No point to trying to sleep now.

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