Something amazing has come over me. I feel "M" physically when she's gone. I was calm in my last relationships, thinking it was just maturity. This time, I feel her in my skin. It's so weird. I don't know what's happening. I do know that these tentative first steps make this new relationship something akin to a ball of the finest crystal, so fragile and important. I know I have to work to give the ball wings to keep itself aloft.
I haven't kissed her and I am trying to put that off until it becomes the sign that we are heading to the next level. I have learned that I need to learn before becoming physical but the physical is so out there with "M." It's gonna be a fight.
My chest is tight, I am so anxious. I feel myself already getting wrapped around her pinky. I must be insane. Good people keep happening to me and I know that God answers my prayers... and when I least expect it. She has made it clear that she does not want to be under my thumb. I think T and V would tell her, as both remarked to me, that I let them be themselves. I own no one. I might WANT TO... but I know the truth of the matter.
I may add more to this train of thought later. I have to get back to my job....
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