another day in paradise

I was in a tired and very unhappy mood today.  I lost the game with a new "chatter."

It wasn't until later in the day that things started getting better.  I found out a friend has found love.

Then someone new IMed me and things went bad again.  Some people can't handle my brand of honesty.  I am not going to try to be shiny and beautiful.  I am flawed.  I am not better than you or my neighbor. I will say EXACTLY what's on my mind, without artifice or condescension.

I am not perky and I am far from perfect. 

It will take someone special to love me.  So far the best offer I have had is from a man in California who talks really sweetly to me.  I am circumspect about talking to this sweet fellow more than I already have because I don't want to encourage him about any prospect of a serious relationship.

Life is a learning process.   A few things you have to remember:

a. You are not responsible for other people's feelings or actions.

b. Love is the way, but sometimes debate and dissent are side-trips you just can't miss.

The truth is that I "suffer" depression.  That is not my fault.  It is something I must fight on a daily basis.  I have learned to be grateful that people come into your life and then leave rapidly.  It is so much better to end something than to carry on a false life and have it end so much farther down the road when you've changed your life to fit around the lie.